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Daddy's little girl

Today is the anniversary of my dad’s passing. I can’t believe how fast the years have gone. Next year I will have lived 13 years with him in my life and 13 years without him. I’m so glad I had him there when I was young and impressionable; he made such an impact on who I am today. I was always daddy’s little girl, I adored him and always felt so close with him. At the same time, I wish he had been here when I was older, so I could have appreciated having him around more, rather than just taking it for granted as children do.
The thing I find hardest is picturing my wedding day, and how I won’t have him there to walk me down the aisle. The thought of that just devastates me. I just hope he's proud of me and all that I have done over the years.

One of my favourite memories is watching Top Gun with my dad, his friend Gary and Gary's daughter Caroline. Dad and Gary would always sing and embarrass us-

"You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips
And there's no tenderness like before in your fingertips
You're trying hard not to show it (baby)
But baby, baby I know it.....

You've lost that lovin' feeling,
Whoa, that lovin' feeling,
You've lost that lovin' feeling,
Now it's gone...gone...gone...wooooooh"

Dinner tonight with mum, I know how hard she still finds it. I still remember the day. I think I was in shock for about the first week. I've never made it down to the crematorium to see his plaque and remains. I've been to too many funerals down there, too many memories. I'd rather just keep the momories in my head for now.

I love you dad